LOVE DARe: Day 10

Love is unconditional.

Love is a choice.

God's love is a choice.

We love because God first loved us (1 John 4:19).

The reason for loving my wife should not be based on something to do with her qualities.

Reason: when those qualities suddenly or gradually disappear, the basis for love is over!

The only way love can last a lifetime is if it is unconditional.

Unconditional love is not determined by the one being loved but rather by the one choosing to love.

This love is:

"In sickness and health" love;

"For richer or poorer" love;

"For better or worse" love.

This is true love - agape.

This is God's kind of love (1 John 4:10).

Love is not based on feelings or circumstances but on commitment.

This is love that "bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things" (1 Cor. 13:7).

I dare to no longer say to my wife, "I love you because ..." Instead I will say, "I love you, period!"

LOVE DARe: Day 9

Love makes good impressions.

The state of a couple's relationship can be discerned in the way they greet one another.

Greeting ones spouse may seem inconsequential but it carries surprising significance.

Ones spouse deserve politeness and acknowledgement.

Adding warmth and enthusiasm gives one the chance to touch a mate's heart in subtle, unspoken ways.

Being nice: 

The first thing I say to my wife when I wake in the morning is significant;

The look on my face when I get in the car speaks volume;

The energy in my voice when I speak to her on the phone sets the mood.

I must learn to act in a way that everything I say and do express the fact that I am really, really glad to be with my wife. 

A simple word, a touch, a tone of voice makes all the difference.

I will seek every opportunity (and on a regular basis) to bless and greet my wife.

Love is a choice!

LOVE DARe: Day 8

Love is not jealous.

Love is not selfish.

Love puts others first.

Love refuses to let jealousy in.

Envy leads to fighting, quarreling, and every evil thing (James 3:16; 4:1-2).

Love ought to lead me to celebrate my wife's successes rather than resent them.

I pray that Love make me see my wife as completing me, not competing with me.

As a loving husband I dare to cheer my wife when she wins.

I must learn not to compare my weaknesses to her strengths.

LOVE DARe: Day 7

Love believes the BEST.

Two rooms sit deep in my heart: Appreciation room and Depreciation room. 

I visit both rooms at different times. 

I started walking into the Appreciation room the day I first met my wife.

In deed I started posting kind words and phrases describing her good attributes.

Over the years since we got married, I visit this room occasionally.

But with passing days I have become a frequent visitor to the Depreciation room which is further down the darker part of the hallway.

This where I have posted all of my disappointments with my wife.

The hurts, unkind words , frustrations are also on the wall of this room.

Her weaknesses and failures are written in bold letters.

This is where the big guns of revenge are stored for the next fight.

Some unpleasant words and even hateful ones found their way in.

Since love chooses to believe the best, I choose to no longer make the Depreciation room my abode.

I will not be running to this room any time I am frustrated or hurt by my wife.

The Appreciation room from this day becomes my permanent residence.

I choose to love and be praying for wife without denying the existence of the Depreciation room. 

I must begin to get into the habit of reining my negative thoughts and teach myself to focus on the positive attributes of my wife.

It is time to let love lead my thoughts and my focus.

LOVE DARe: Day 6

Love is not irritable. 

He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit, than he who captures a city (Prov. 16:32).

Love is hard to offend and quick to forgive.

As a loving husband, I will remain calm and patient, showing mercy and restraining my temper.

I must learn to be a joy and not a jerk!

I choose to be a calming breeze and not a storm waiting to happen !

Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks (Matthew 12:34).

I will teach myself to respond to my wife with patience and encouragement rather than anger and exasperation.

LOVE DARe: Day 5

Love is not rude.

Love is not unpleasant, condescending, unbecoming, embarrassing, or irritating! 

In this dare I learn that I need to intentionally behave in away that is pleasant for my wife to be around.

I must, at all cost, avoid things that frustrate her or cause her discomfort.

I must mind my manners.

I must dare to give my best to my own. 

Love is not rude but lifts me to a higher standard.

I dare to be delightful!

I must be gracious.

LOVE DARe: Day 4

Love that is not selfish is Thoughtful.

Thoughtlessness is a silent enemy to a loving relationship.

I am reminded of when I fell in love with Mary, being thoughtful came quite naturally.

For some reasons I now spend more time thinking about my problems, my personal desires, myself.

I must rekindle the ember of thoughtfulness.

I will endeavor to learn how my wife uniquely thinks.

Instead of "ready, shoot, aim", I will engage my mind first before engaging my lips!