LOVE DARe: Day 12

Love lets the other win.

"The wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield" (James 3:17).

"Willing" is the key word in today's dare.

This is an attitude and spirit of cooperation that should permeate every conversation.

I should be like a palm tree by the ocean that endures the greatest winds because it knows how to gracefully bend.

Jesus gives us an example of selfless love (Philippians 2).

Even though he had every right to stubbornly seek to be served by all humanity, he willingly laid down his life for our sins. 

I should have the attitude of willingness, flexibility, and humble submission. 

I will, willingly, lay down for the good of others what I have the right to claim for myself. 

I must re-learn not to stay entrenched and unbending even though I know it will cost me pride and discomfort.

Instead of treating my wife like an enemy or someone to be guarded against, I will treat her as my closest, most honored and trusted friend.

I choose to honor the one I love.

LOVE DARe: Day 11

Love cherishes. 

"Husbands ought also to love their own wives as their bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself; for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it" (Ephesians 5:28-29).

My wife and I are a part of one another.

My wife is part of who I am.

Our lives are now interwoven together.

Marriage is a very beautiful mystery created by God, joining two lives together as one.

I will cherish my wife as I do to myself. 

I will treat her with respect and tenderness. 

I will take pleasure in who she is.

I must treat my wife with the same nurture and care that I treat myself.

I dare to treasure my wife as a priceless gift!

LOVE DARe: Day 10

Love is unconditional.

Love is a choice.

God's love is a choice.

We love because God first loved us (1 John 4:19).

The reason for loving my wife should not be based on something to do with her qualities.

Reason: when those qualities suddenly or gradually disappear, the basis for love is over!

The only way love can last a lifetime is if it is unconditional.

Unconditional love is not determined by the one being loved but rather by the one choosing to love.

This love is:

"In sickness and health" love;

"For richer or poorer" love;

"For better or worse" love.

This is true love - agape.

This is God's kind of love (1 John 4:10).

Love is not based on feelings or circumstances but on commitment.

This is love that "bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things" (1 Cor. 13:7).

I dare to no longer say to my wife, "I love you because ..." Instead I will say, "I love you, period!"

LOVE DARe: Day 9

Love makes good impressions.

The state of a couple's relationship can be discerned in the way they greet one another.

Greeting ones spouse may seem inconsequential but it carries surprising significance.

Ones spouse deserve politeness and acknowledgement.

Adding warmth and enthusiasm gives one the chance to touch a mate's heart in subtle, unspoken ways.

Being nice: 

The first thing I say to my wife when I wake in the morning is significant;

The look on my face when I get in the car speaks volume;

The energy in my voice when I speak to her on the phone sets the mood.

I must learn to act in a way that everything I say and do express the fact that I am really, really glad to be with my wife. 

A simple word, a touch, a tone of voice makes all the difference.

I will seek every opportunity (and on a regular basis) to bless and greet my wife.

Love is a choice!

LOVE DARe: Day 8

Love is not jealous.

Love is not selfish.

Love puts others first.

Love refuses to let jealousy in.

Envy leads to fighting, quarreling, and every evil thing (James 3:16; 4:1-2).

Love ought to lead me to celebrate my wife's successes rather than resent them.

I pray that Love make me see my wife as completing me, not competing with me.

As a loving husband I dare to cheer my wife when she wins.

I must learn not to compare my weaknesses to her strengths.

LOVE DARe: Day 7

Love believes the BEST.

Two rooms sit deep in my heart: Appreciation room and Depreciation room. 

I visit both rooms at different times. 

I started walking into the Appreciation room the day I first met my wife.

In deed I started posting kind words and phrases describing her good attributes.

Over the years since we got married, I visit this room occasionally.

But with passing days I have become a frequent visitor to the Depreciation room which is further down the darker part of the hallway.

This where I have posted all of my disappointments with my wife.

The hurts, unkind words , frustrations are also on the wall of this room.

Her weaknesses and failures are written in bold letters.

This is where the big guns of revenge are stored for the next fight.

Some unpleasant words and even hateful ones found their way in.

Since love chooses to believe the best, I choose to no longer make the Depreciation room my abode.

I will not be running to this room any time I am frustrated or hurt by my wife.

The Appreciation room from this day becomes my permanent residence.

I choose to love and be praying for wife without denying the existence of the Depreciation room. 

I must begin to get into the habit of reining my negative thoughts and teach myself to focus on the positive attributes of my wife.

It is time to let love lead my thoughts and my focus.

LOVE DARe: Day 6

Love is not irritable. 

He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit, than he who captures a city (Prov. 16:32).

Love is hard to offend and quick to forgive.

As a loving husband, I will remain calm and patient, showing mercy and restraining my temper.

I must learn to be a joy and not a jerk!

I choose to be a calming breeze and not a storm waiting to happen !

Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks (Matthew 12:34).

I will teach myself to respond to my wife with patience and encouragement rather than anger and exasperation.

LOVE DARe: Day 5

Love is not rude.

Love is not unpleasant, condescending, unbecoming, embarrassing, or irritating! 

In this dare I learn that I need to intentionally behave in away that is pleasant for my wife to be around.

I must, at all cost, avoid things that frustrate her or cause her discomfort.

I must mind my manners.

I must dare to give my best to my own. 

Love is not rude but lifts me to a higher standard.

I dare to be delightful!

I must be gracious.

LOVE DARe: Day 4

Love that is not selfish is Thoughtful.

Thoughtlessness is a silent enemy to a loving relationship.

I am reminded of when I fell in love with Mary, being thoughtful came quite naturally.

For some reasons I now spend more time thinking about my problems, my personal desires, myself.

I must rekindle the ember of thoughtfulness.

I will endeavor to learn how my wife uniquely thinks.

Instead of "ready, shoot, aim", I will engage my mind first before engaging my lips!

Cleric defrocked for satanism claims: The Presbyterian Church of East Africa on Thursday defrocked a former moderator

The Daily Nation POSTED  THURSDAY, APRIL 3, 2014 |  BY- OUMA WANZALA

The Presbyterian Church of East Africa on Thursday defrocked a former moderator after he claimed the church was riddled with devil worship and homosexuality.

A statement by the church’s decision making body, the business committee, read by moderator David Gathanju said Dr David Githii would no longer be referred to as reverend.

Dr Githii was directed to surrender church vestments, but will remain an ordinary member.

“The Kajiado Presbytery defrocked him as per the procedure of the church. The church had already received his resignation letter and decided to let him go. We have endorsed his defrocking,” the Rev Gathanju said.

Dr Githii, however, insisted his allegations were true and that the church had resorted to defrocking clerics who dared talk about the vices.

“What I said is true. Devil worship has been practised in the church since the 1990s while homosexuality has been rife since 2001,” he said.

Several clerics in the church were aware of the problems but dared not say anything, Dr Githii claimed.

NEVER MADE ALLEGATIONS IN ANY COMMITTEE

The Rev Gathanju, however, maintained neither devil worship nor homosexuality were practised at the church and that anyone found engaging in the practices would be expelled.

He said Dr Githii had never made his allegations in any committee or court of the church.

“We are aware that Dr Githii made several assertions in regard to what he termed ‘satanic symbols’ in our church and even government institutions. These are his personal opinions that the church found to have no biblical or theological basis.”

When Dr Githii succeeded the Rev Dr Jesse Kamau as PCEA moderator in 2003, he changed the method of worship to become “more agreeable to the modern Christian community”.

He also linked some symbols in the church to Freemasonry and devil worship, leading to their destruction at St Andrews Church, Nairobi, in 2004.

A row over Freemasonry split the PCEA, leading to the removal of priceless historical artefacts from its prayer houses.

LOVE DARe: Day 3

Love is not selfish (Philippians 2:3).

Love is never satisfied except in the welfare of others.

Today's DARe speaks to the very heart of my Christian faith.

Paul exhorted the Romans in Romans 12:10 to be devoted to each in brotherly love and to give preference to one another in honor.

The word that basically means the opposite of love is selfishness.

It is definitely a trait I hate in other people but justify in myself.

I must learn not to put my interests, desires, and priorities in front of my wife.

I am going to teach myself not to constantly complain about the time and energy I spend meeting the needs of my wife.

As Paul spoke to the Corinthians, my love should not seek its own (1 Cor. 13:5).

My actions, no matter how generous they will be, must not be motivated by the desire for bragging rights or expectation to receive a reward.

I choose to put the happiness of my wife above my own.

I choose to genuinely demonstrate love.

LOVE DARe: Day 2

Kindness is love in action.

Love in its truest sense is not based on feelings.

Kindness is love in action aimed at maximizing a positive circumstance.

Kindness creates a blessing (Proverbs 3:3-4.)

Because I desire to be kind to my wife, I will be careful on how I treat her without being unnecessarily harsh.

I will be sensitive, tender, speaking the truth in love.

I will serve my wife without worrying about my rights.

I will not be obstinate, stubborn, or reluctant.

I will cooperate and stay flexible; compromise and accommodate.

I will listen first instead of demanding my way.

I will be the first to greet, the first to smile, the first to serve, and the first to forgive.

I must learn to demonstrate kindness, before I can learn to love.

My 40 Days of Purpose: LOVE DARe - Day 1

Love is built on two foundational pillars: patience and kindness.

Learning patience will allow me to respond in a positive way to a negative situation.

Patience brings internal calm when the external is exploding.

Anger must not be my emotional default when treated unfairly.

From Patience I will draw Wisdom so that I learn to listen without rushing to judgment.

Rather than declare my home a war zone, I will practice patience to foster peace and calm.

I must pursue patience as an essential ingredient to my marriage relationship.